Thursday, February 05, 2009

New scoot on the block

Oswald Chubb isn't a name anyone would wish to be born with. Oswald Nachtengale fathered Natasha Nachtengale and after she married Felix Chubb their first born son was named in honor of the her father. This is how Oswald Chubb got his name. There but for the grace of the angels go I. At least my legacy name is buried in the middle.

Oswald Chubb looks pretty much like you would expect someone with this name to look. He is a doughy, pasty, lump of a chap with bad skin, a bad haircut, and pants that are too tight for his belly and too short for his inseam. He makes his living in produce. He knows his vegetables. He has worked all the green grocers in Dorchester, serving stints at the bigger operations like Lambert's Rainbow Fruit, the Shaw's Supermarket on Morrisey Blvd, and the Stop & Shop a little farther down Morrisey. He enjoyed the prestige that accompanied employment at these large establishments but as he has gotten older he has used his expertise to improve the vegetable selection at smaller, neighborhood, corner shops. He has worked the oriental groceries along Dorchester's Umami Mile and gained experience with more exotic greens while introducing iceberg lettuce and bell peppers to the shelves.

Romance hasn't been a big feature in Oswald Chubb's life. He has had girlfriends in the past but his relationships were never mutually satisfying for either party. Like many people in Dorchester, Oswald Chubb takes the bus to get around. He thinks he would like to change his image into something a bit sportier and in this way, perhaps, increase his prospects with available members of the fairer sex. With this in mind he visited Scooters Go Green in South Boston, just north of Dorchester on Old Colony Avenue.

Needless to say, a February day with the thermometer topping 17 degrees Fahrenheit isn't a busy day in a motor scooter shop. Oswald Chubb had the staff's full attention. He wasn't planning on driving out of the lot. He was planning ahead toward spring, like every scooterist does. He looked over the showroom models and decided on 'The Rabbit' which is a sporty, retro-styled model priced at a mere $999.00. He tested the feel of the seat and the brakes on the floor. He liked what he felt and he pictured himself speeding down Dot Ave, passing a bus. He made a deposit and purchased a helmet.

Come mid-March Oswald Chubb will dashing through Dorchester on a brand-new, factory-fresh, creamsicle-orange Rabbit. Ladies take notice: there's going to be a new scoot on the block.

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