Sunday, September 21, 2008

Eastie Contingent

With a girly name like the Peppermint Squad, it is safe to assume that this Dorchester-based motor scooter gang has always had a strong co-ed component. Boys and girls like to play together and the people in Dorchester always feel the female compliments the male in more ways than one. Despite thier pansy-style monniker, the members of the Peppermint Squad keep the trunks of their motor scooters well stocked with brass knuckles, blackjacks, collapsible batons and rusty chains. One never knows when a rumble will break out.

The East Boston Contingent buzzed into Dorchester last night, crossing the border on Dot Ave at 7:37 PM under cover of a gibbous moon. The Peppermint Squad is tough, but it has its softer side. The Eastie Contingent is a rough-and-tumble gang of roustabout scooterists who are as flinty and unyielding as the tarmac at Logan Airport. The Peppermint Squad welcomes women in the ranks. The Eastie Contingent would welcome them too if any applied for membership. What woman wants to congregate with a group filled with brutes named Dark Horse, Spaz, Mumbles, Iron Butt, Pollo Loco, and Musty Jake? Members of the Eastie Contingent are ugly, dirty, mean, and cheap.

A flurry of text messages reached Peppermint headquarters and the Saturday Night Watch was dispatched to see what the Easties were doing so far from thier home turf. According to reports, the interlopers looked like they meant trouble. They were riding down Dot Ave with a hungry look in thier eyes and with thier tongues hanging like thirsty wolves.

The Peppermint Squad intercepted the Eastie Contingent at Field's Corner. Dark Horse hailed Tiny Phillips who happened to be on duty at the clubhouse when the alarm was sounded. The two gangs circled each other is a buzz of 50cc droning in the parking lot in front of the Food Basket supermarket. Once the pagentry had been exhausted, Dark Horse and Tiny met in conclave apart from the throng of parked scooters. It turned out the Easties had spent all their money on tolls in the Ted Williams Tunnel. Dark Horse asked Tiny if the Peppermints would spot thier across-the-Charles scooter brethren a beer before they headed home. Tiny Phillips agreed. Courtesy is the Peppermint Squad creed. The Peppermints and the Easties shared pints of Pabst Blue Ribbon at Tom English's before the Easties headed home. Thus violence was averted in Dorchester again and the Peppermint Squad was promised reciprocal treatment should they ever be found north of Maverick Square.

1 comment:

Randy Carboni said...

Ha, this installment is my favorite.

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