Thursday, October 09, 2008

Cheap Gas in Beantown!

Is this a chemistry story or a ghost story?

A young lady living on Sudan Street reports the following occurance: Cabbage was on sale at the Harbor Point Shaw's Supermarket. Not only was it on sale for regular customers, but there was an extra 20 cent discount for patrons who used a Shaw's Rewards Card at time of check-out. This young lady had a Rewards Card in her wallet so she put two heads in her basket.

Making her way down the ethnic foods aisle, our heroine noticed that kidney beans were on sale. I was only a regular kind of sale with no added discount for card holders. Three cans of dark kidney beans were available for a dollar. She considered this a good deal and selected two cans of kidney beans. While depositing the last can in her basket, she noticed a dark brown spot on the label. It could have been blood but it could just as easily have been a droplet of dried bean juice leftover after packaging. She decided it was the latter and purchased this stained can.

Settling into her walk-in, Sudan Street kitchen, the young lady chopped a head of cabbage and added a can of beans, simmering the two together according to an old, family recipe. She noticed she didn't have any carraway seeds in the pantry and her grandmother always recommended carraway with cabblage "to keep the winds down." Rather than trudge back to Shaw's Supermarket, the young lady prepared her dinner sans carraway. It was quite good when all was done and consumed.

The lady reports she sleeps on her stomach, as many people do. This is a position that discourages flinging one's arms and legs to disturb the covers. It doesn't allow enough leverage or range of motion to rearrange the bed clothes overly much.

Last night, the lady assumed her usual position and slept the sleep of the dead. We have no eyewitness evidence or documentary photographs, but upon awakening she says the quilt and flannel sheet that covered her at the former day's end had been flung across the room by the next day's break. By her account she awoke in the exact position in which she had fallen asleep. When she raised her head she found her naked body on an uncovered bed and a pile of sheets hurled against the opposite wall either from an explosion or from a supernatural action.

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