My secret Boston

[Editorial correction 01/27:  It appears the assessment below may have been a bit hasty.  I was waiting for February 1 to investigate further but apparently My Secret Boston is up and running more than I discovered when I looked it over the other day.  I'll spend the weekend poking around further and update then.  As for not knowing where Newton is, I can't apologize for that.  -WK]

If you haven't heard, a new website is being launched on February 1st.  It's called "My Secret Boston Dot Com."  It's some kind of insiders' guide, sort of what we do here but with a bigger budget, and actual staff who get paid actual salaries from paid advertisements.

I was interested to learn what the site's "secret" Boston Irish Bakery would be.   I've never heard of it, but that's not too surprising because it's not in Dorchester.  If you spend most of your time in Boston, I'll bet donuts against dollars that you haven't heard of it either.  This hidden Boston Irish bakery is hidden in the town of Newton.  It's some joint called the Keltic Krust.  Not a bad name; maybe Kandy's Kozy Keltic Kellar was already taken.

I'm coming up on three years living in Boston and I can't tell you where Newton is.  That qualifies as being both secret and hidden in my book.  If I had a secret Boston, I know I'd keep it a few towns removed.  You know, where all the insiders are.

No one has asked me to write an article for Their Secret Boston, but if I had to name a good Irish bakery, I would write about Greenhills Irish Bakery at 780 Adams Street.  It's in Adams Village, which is part of Boston, diagonally across the street from the Eire Pub, which is an Irish pub.  The Prime Minister of Ireland dropped by last year.  The bakery is next door to one Irish grocery and across the street from another.

I can't speak for the town of Newton.  I've never heard of it.  I doubt it's any more Irish than Adams Village, a place that's almost as Gaelic as Dublin.  No offense to the people who run the Keltic Krust.  I'm sure they make fine bread.  When I want my bread crust spelled with a 'c' however, the way Celt is spelled, I'll stay within city limits and visit the Greenhills Bakery.

No word yet on how far off the Orange Line I have to travel to find a hidden Boston Chinese Restaurant.  The site officially launches February 1.  I'll find out soon after that, I'm sure.

Mojo in the dojo

Besides HQ off Codman Square and the satellite office in Kane Square, the Peppermint Squad maintains a dojo off Neponset Circle. Johnny Cake and Little Buddy were there all day Sunday practicing the finer points of scoot-jitsu. Johnny Cake is the leader of the Squad's combat battalion. He rides a yellow, Honda Big Ruckus with a license plate that reads BTLWGN.

Little Buddy rides a Genuine Scooter Company Buddy, kitted out with an illegal muffler to provide extra speed. It is the Peppermint Squad's official combat bike though the Big Ruckus is the official battle wagon that is deployed to lead a charge. The Buddy is equipped not only with an oversized muffler but with a number of fighting tools that make it essential for agressive operations. Among the Buddy's accoutrements are a cache of ball bearings attached to a quick-release switch, a smoke screen powered by a special blend of strawberry scented, Japanese, two-stroke oil, and mountings that fit a halberd making this scooter fit for fearsome jousting.

Johnny Cake originally trained under a Whooping Crane Wu-Li master in Oregon. Since moving to Boston, he has become the combat battalion's Adjutant General, directing training and formulating strategic manuevers. Little Buddy came by his skills watching 1970s scooter movies shot in Hong Kong. He practiced his moves late at night under the lights at Ronan Park when the cops were distracted elsewhere. He is the battalion's Attache General. The two of them keep the Peppermint Squad's fighting forces ship shape. By combining their two styles into a new form of scoot-jitsu they have welded together a rag tag band of scooteristas that have yet to meet their match.